i feel so ... vindicated

that sin quiz is stupid.



im like hotter than hot man. im close to 3rd degree burn.

go on. bask in my hotness here.

its not bacteria .. its called in denial

ok, so apparently, at any given time, any average human being is host to around 3 pounds of bacteria in their body. skin, stomach, hair follicles, black-head-stuffed pores on your nose, in your mouth, under your fingernails, anywhere, you name it.

although that fact kind of grosses me out, but in a way, im glad that i now have 3 pounds of reason to blame my extra weight on.

i don’t remember science as being this interesting since the first chapter of form 3.

are we still on that why the hell men need nipples case?

yes.

turns out.. im not the only one boggled by this. i mean people's been asking about this since the dawn of man's nipples. here more stuff i found on justcurio.us :

why do men have nipples 1

why do men have nipples 2

why do men have nipples 3

why do men have nipples 4

do men really need nipples?

where the points are as useless as nipples are on men…

i think im gonna start my own daily epiphanies here. file it under “shit lisha’s only gotten to know about today because her brain development is as slow as lady drivers sms-ing while driving”. but for the life of me, i don’t know how to categorize my posts. maybe i’ll learn how to someday and post that under “shit lisha's only gotten to know about today because her brain development is as slow as lady drivers sms-ing while driving”.

well anyway.. i kinda pointed this stupid question out last friday, well actually its friday furling into saturday. it was well past our bedtimes, we started to talk crap. everybody was drunk on teh o’ ais limau. while ayis and nash were busy talking robots, and farah was confused as to which conversation to focus on, i asked yoke ...

why do men have nipples anyway?

i just don’t see the point. they would look weird without but what exactly do men need nipples for? one of yoke’s friends replied : “men have nipples to confuse the child while their mother goes for toilet or cigarette breaks.”

so i asked the internet. shouldve asked the internet before i asked yoke.

and so the best explaination that the internet has given me is .. "God in his infinite wisdom knew that somewhere along the line a man would invent the nipple-clamp and God being the omnipotent and good fellow he is didn't want the man's day ruined so he gave all men nipples." - and thats from a guy from the god-fearing country called ireland.

no, seriously. why?

it all boils down to this : chromosome confusion. a genetic glitch. you see.. human babies cant really tell if they want to become a girl or god forbid, a boy the first few weeks they’re in their mother’s womb. basically, we all started off as bixsexuals and thus we develop the same body parts, you know.. arms, nose, mouths, legs, nipples, until we’ve made up our goddamn minds. although sometimes, we never seem to really have our minds made up.

yes people. see… lisha knows a bit more than you do now. but really, reading about it has left me more confused than ever. you’re as confused as i am? perhaps, this and this and this will explain it to you.

oh and.. did you read this? … “as many as seven pairs of nipples are arranged along either side of a "milk line," a ridge of skin that runs from the upper chest to the navel”. wtf? not only did we start off a bisexual. we were a freak too!

and this one .. "men are basically just women with dicks" - that one actually came from the people at harvard. but its kinda true though ... in so many levels.

stop bugging me

ok, this is just plain gross. i mean i know that there are parasites living off us, feeding on our blood and dead skin and other bodily secretions … but this one just makes me wanna scratch my eyeballs out of their comfortable sockets.

goes to show that ignorance truly is bliss.

i first read about eyelash and face mites on eigthballmag. then i googled it. (you can read about it here and here and here and here and here and .. damn those minute little monsters are as famous as britney spears’ virginity. wikipedia didnt have anything on those buggers though, i wonder why). humans are curious creatures by nature but why the hell did i google it, i don’t know. its kinda like hearing ghost stories. they don’t normally scare me. until i hear about it. im a wuss, i admit as much. watching blair witch project kept me awake for 3 nights in a row. coz every time i tried to close my eyes, i swore i could hear 12 children playing outside my dormroom. what scares me the most though is the fact that i got this much time in my hands to blog and google about this.

but those face and follicle fuckers are real. when i read about those damned demodicids, i cant help but feel them crawling all over my body, squiggling their wormy faces into my hair follicles, waving their metazoan ass up in the air, stuffing their miniscule crab-like mouths with my epithelials, and making a cozy little home fully furnished like an ikea catalog in my sebaceous glands. suddenly i need a bath. suddenly i feel the need to obsessive compulsively scrub every inch of pores and orifice till they bleed and oozing out pus.

hey, dont roll your eyes. just fucking look at this picture and tell me you don’t feel that need too, and then you can judge me crazy.



i conclude as thus : i wont be kissing any eyelids in the name of love and affection hence on.

sidenote :

makes me think. yes i do use that lard between my ears sometimes. why must we waste a lot of money and resources trying to find out if there are other lifeforms out there when we obviously have more aliens living in the deep, dark bottomless cavum of our planet's unventured ocean trenches.

and our eyelashes.