a new perspective

it's been a while since a proper update. i gotta make a living and this blog is not giving me money so you understand why i dont pay that much attention to it. and besides, there's nothing much to update coz ive been spending too much time at work and not with life.  but work, despite hectic and tiring, we're still having fun because, like kids, we easily find things that can amuse and entertain us. in our case, the new managers.

Ayis has been away for 5 days since thursday for his BTN course. and then arwen had fever again probably coz she's missing her dad too much. we didnt get that much sleep until last night, my mom and i. which makes me worry because next month, ayis will be away again for much longer. he's got an induction course in Kluang from the 10th-25th.

My cousins will be flying in from perth next month too for another cousin's wedding. so we're planning a little cousins only get-together on one saturday although im not sure i will be attending since ayis wont be around and i have to leave the kid at home. we've did that before, going for a party and leaving the kid at home with mom. the guilt that tormented us the whole night was ridiculous that we rushed home even before the party started. we were constantly thinking about arwen when we were supposed to have fun and in the end the entire night was not fun at all. the only fun part was the dinner just the two of us before the party. i'm still undecided. we'll cross that bridge when we come to it next month. i sound like an old lady, i know. im the only one amongst my cousins who has a kid so i can understand if they dont understand.

something new this week : thanks to my mom, last saturday, i've got my eyes lasik-ed (finally) after my brother's recommendation. the procedure was tolerable, in a sense. hey, ive gone through childbirth without epidural. it's a shame if i'd have pain complaints with the eyes. it was uncomfortable, that, i have to point out. because you have people poking and playing with your eyes and you can see and hear everything. and then you have this claps that presses your eyeballs so that it stays in place when the doctor creates this flap around your iris. it felt weird. but luckily it only took a few minutes. i think the whole procedure only took about half and hour.

but the hour after that, when the anesthetic wore off, wow. the pain was excruciating. it was even worse than childbirth. at least contractions come in waves the the adrenaline was at the highest point and lasted for days. but this one, fucking hell! i can't open my eyes for 3-4 hours. i can't sleep even after my brother cooked me up a combination of painkillers. i just had to endure the pain of having salty tears washing raw cuts.  

i can slowly start to see things clearly. although it's still blurry at some distances. i can't focus to read things too close or too far, kinda like using contact lenses. but it's considerably improved and i can see much better than i did with glasses. and kinda like wearing contact lenses, the eyes get dry easily which is why i need to drop artificial tears ever so often. and my computer is currently a bit curved with these new eyes and i have to turn the screen brightness down a bit and wear my bigass sunglasses. everything's still a bit too bright right now and i can't strain my eyes too much yet with staring at the computer too long or reading too much. i'm supposed to be on MC today but ive got too much shit to do.

what falie said is true. it is freeing not to be looking for my glasses the first thing in the morning, it's freeing not to be relying and be encumbered by glasses or contact lenses. it's freeing not having to try to avoid from arwen always taking and almost destroying my glasses.

so if any of you who wants to get your eyes done, i reckon that you just do it.