monthly letter : month nineteen

Dear Arwen,



Guess what? Guess what? At 19 months was the month that you were able to say your own name! No, actually, it was at 18 months, but you could only do part of it, and it sounded like we've been teaching you kelantanese. You used to call yourself "Awe" of all things. But now, now, you've able to sound the 'n' at the end of your name, it sounds like Ar-wyen (rhymes with Kahwin). I felt a tingle in my uterus the moment you were able to say your name properly. When we ask you what's your name, you say "Ar-wyen" and when we ask you again, you go "Anana", so to you right now, your name is Ar-wyen Anana.



Aunty Mona got married to Uncle Hafiz last month! Not your first time meeting them but i expected you'd be a little bit more friendly to them, but no such luck. It was your first time meeting Uncle Jeff & Aunty (opps, sorry, Kakak) Julie, and Aunty Liana. Aunty Liana got you a pair of knee-high boots - you looked so stylish in it. at least for the 15 minutes that it lasted before you whined at me to take off your "tush". the boots were just too snug for you so i sent it back to Aunty Liana to exchange for a few sizes bigger. Don't know when or how we're gonna get it back from her. Maybe we'll come down to Perth for a holiday one of these days. Whatdya say?





Back at Aunty Mona's wedding. You weren't being such a nice baby there (despite how cute people generally think, and say when they look you). You cried during the most crucial moments like in the middle of the akad nikah, and also in the middle of the doa recital at Uncle Hafiz' reception. so in the videos, all we'd hear are your constant wailing and whining. People were looking at us like we were idiots for not putting on a condom. so, yeah, thanks for that. don't get me wrong kid, I love you and it's insane how much love i have for you, but please, dial down on the diva a notch? thank you.



You love tunnels! i don't know why. i'm slightly claustrophobic, but you ... you are FEARLESS! (ok, actually not so much. you're afraid of the toy train that moves by itself so now you keep telling everyone about the train that scares you). You know when there's a tunnel coming up when we take a drive and you'll anticipate it with a cute, excited exclamation of "Nunne!". one night, while we were going through the Penchala Link tunnel and i pointed out how there were many lights in the tunnel that night and you casually went "Malam" like "Duhh, Ma!"





We were supposed to take you to the beach in Kuantan, but we had to look at a house that we were planning to buy so plans changed. you were so excited about the beach that one time, you put all your soft toys into a paperbag and bid me bye-bye while dragging that bag full of your friends. and when i asked you where you were going, you didnt even stop to look at me when you said "Beesh!". Really sorry for the change of plans. We'll take you to the beach next time, i promise. It's not too far from MakTok's anyway. we can go to the beach anytime we go back there. You're really lucky in that way, you know?







But as a compensation, we went to Aunty Mona & Uncle Hafiz' apartment for a swim with all of your other uncles and aunties. You loved the pool (or "poon", according to you) so much you didn't even want to come out even when your face was all blue and you're shivering. Aunty Liana was a bit surprised and she went "Baby, you love water! Are you sure you're your mom's kid?". I don't like water that much mostly because i look like a whale in a swimsuit. Not a visual you want stuck in your head. You take loving water (also the not having a sweet tooth thing) after your dad. The temper, the diva-esqueness, the curls, the cheeks (and the nose too unfortunately) ... you got those from me.





oh! im not sure if you want to remember this, but it'd be a cool story to tell your friends about during stormy evenings in school while there's no substitute teachers available and you all have to fend for yourselves and you'd while all those free time away telling spooky stories and playing the stupid ouija board. the day we went to Aunty Mona's place, while we were looking for a parking space in the dark parking lot, you were happily singing a medley of all the songs you know and all of a sudden, you looked out the window and said "Nenek!" "Nenek!". of course there's nothing there so i told you, "Mana ada nenek, Wen" and you then pointed out towards the nothingness and said "Tuu. Nenek". i tried to think nothing of it and distracted your gaze away from the window. maybe you didn't see anything, your threshold of imagination can be pretty wild these days. but then again maybe you did. it's too cool not to tell the others about it.



your role-playing phase is on a spike lately. somedays, you want to be a baby and you'd give me a blanket to swaddle you in and hug you and talk baby talks to you while you pretend to sleep. somedays, you'd play mom to all your toy friends and make them pretend tea and feed them pretend milk and pretend cookies and pretend bubur. it's so fun watching you play. we even bought you blocks but thing is, we're the ones who'd play with it more than you do. and once we're done constructing something out if it, you'd come and destroy it. like Godzilla. that's what we call you sometimes, among other things.



You're starting to show a jealous streak. You'd cry and push your dad away when he's giving me a hug. we find that ridiculously amusing that we'd hug in spite of you. but despite that, you are a very very giving person. you don't mind sharing your toys and food with others when they ask you nicely for it. you just don't like sharing me. awww. you're sweet! so, yeah, no baby brother or sister for you for now. maybe ever. we'll see.



Lots of crazy love,
Mamma.

photo credits : myself, cousins, falie, kudegraphy.